June 2003 Archives

Of course I again, stole this off of ~T~'s today. Hummmm, I guess some of it fits me ~ not sure about all of it. I also noticed earlier today that Madbull also took the test. Go to ~T~'s blog and get the link and see what you think. The test is "What Your Birthday Says About You"

Of slight build
lots of charm
appeal and attraction
pleasant aura
flirtatious
adventurous
sensitive
always in love
wants to love and be loved
faithful and tender partner
very generous
scientific talents
lives for today
a carefree philosopher with imagination

As well as had a great conversation with Mad tonight where he turned me onto a new web site ~ every day it gives you a new word and an amount of time for you to write about the word given. Personally, I think it is a really cool website.

In my talk with Madbull, I also found out, with the new format I have that it is hard to find links on my page inside my post. Tonight I tried something new by bolding them first and then link up the web site. That is a temporary fix until I chat with my "technical advisor aka ~T~" to see if it can become easier to find.

Not much to report actually on the home front here of interest unless you are interested in my baseball widowhood which I'm non to pleased about. So I figured I'd share some of my new found tidbits from help from friends around us.

Hope everyone had a great weekend ~ and Yoda ~ I got the email ~ now how to I get them in my icon menu???????????? I'm waiting for you to tell me how so hurry up!!! :biggrin

EVERYTIME I FIND MR. RIGHT MY HUSBAND SCARES HIM AWAY

Well first off, the link, it is official now, our photoblog is up and running and linked on my side bar. Titled "Jet's Photoblog". There are not that many photo's up thus far, but will continually keep adding to it, as I have a TON of photo's to add. Now please also note, to see all the photo's posted and such, you'll have to check out every catagory listed. I'd love to be able to take credit for this, however, I can't. All my abilities of blogging, photoblog and the like I owe to ~T~ she soooo takes care of me always!!! If I were into women I'd be giving ~L~ a run for her money :biggrin. *just kidding ~L~ I know I wouldn't stand a chance, but couldn't resist* :smile. Thank you both for the call today!!!!

Okay that covers the link ~ now for the women ~ I love this one!!! Another one sent to me from my mother n law :smile

Now for the men!!! All I can say is "OUCH" and "WHY"!!!

For all the people who have wished me a Happy Birthday ~ thank you very much *S* ~ Desiree thank you for the upcoming gift I'm anxiously awaiting for you to get it done :smile.

Have a great rest of the weekend everyone!!!

MY INNER CHILD IS A SASSY LITTLE BITCH TOO

For my weekend celebration ~ but I guess I'm no spring chicken any longer :let_it_all_out. It started Thursady actually all day ~ about mid morning I felt something pull, so I thought, which doubled me over for the whole day. I finally called Speedbump at work crying telling him GET HOME NOW!!!!

I hate doctor's or at least having to go and visit them ~ so me going to a doctor is never an option, but when I'm begging to go to the doctor, everyone knows something is wrong. By about 2/3 a.m. I was begging to have a doctor I was in so much pain an agony. Somehow I managed to fall asleep, maybe passed out from pain, who knows.

I was awaken this morning by my parents calling ~ now can anyone tell me how one's mother can tell something is dead wrong over a phone line? I answered and she said hello you sound like crap what's wrong? I told her nothing I wasn't feeling well was all ~ I got the whole motherly lecture DON'T LIE TO ME something more than "not feeling well is wrong".....so much to the point she called Speedbump at work. Yes, people I was determined I was going to celebrate my birthday in style and sent Speedbump to work.

It didn't last long, he came home around lunch time, I went to the doctor only to be told two things ~ one a compliment :biggrin the doctor said that my chart stated I had two kids, I told her yes, she said you obviously didn't have them, I laughed and said no no I definately had them, she shook her head and said lucky woman, not one streatch mark on your body, you make women sick.....:biggrin then she dumped the other news on me ~ "you are taking your non stretched marked butt to the emergency room ~ one of three things ~ kidney stones, appendicis *however you spell it*, or a tumor in your kidney. "

Speedbump and I made arrangements for the kids, since we are baseball packed AGAIN this weekend, and little Ms. Prissy Princess I would probably have strangled in an emergency room. So his mom came and picked her up for the night and off we went to spend my whole night in the emergency room.

Good news is ~ so far I'm out of the woods about appendics ~ however something has ruptured according to the cat scan. It appears, as the second doctor stated, to be a ruptured Ovarian Cyst but he can not determine that completely. I'm to make an appointment with my OBGYN Monday and have her check me out.

Speedbump, doing the best he can to put me in a better mood, took me to Carraba's *again however you spell it*, it is an Italian Grill to die for!!! I love that resturant ~ he and I both knew things were still not right when I could barely eat my food and wound up with a take out bag almost completely full, minus a few bites I was able to eat.

So in summary, one of two things on my actual birthday will be happening, I'll be in absolute misery OR I'll be flying so high on these painkillers I won't care :smile. So wish me luck as I don't do doctor's/visit/test etc and being forced to do so now.

But on a happier note, I've gotten some really great birthday wishes from my friends, go check out Buffy's blog with her birthday wishes to me and even received an early birthday present from one of my friends in California. She sent me the Eagles "Hell Freezes Over" tour DVD and my friend in England called the other day to wish me a happy birthday early as well ~ so not all has been a bust :smile.

Well I'm off to bed ~ everyone have a great weekend!!!

In my frantic search to find the answers to the questions from Redbook Magazine that were posted last night, I ran across this article. So not to confuse anyone that these are my "own" ideas, I'm going to link the article!!!! :biggrin!!! *for those who haven't figured out my page, just run your mouse over the word "article" and click*

If you don't have time to read the article it is titled "Should We Invite Another Woman In Our Bed?".

Well being the type woman "I DON"T SHARE PERIOD NO QUESTIONS ASKED" if that is Speedbumps fantasy well that is as far as it is going to get with me...............He's MINE..........any man I've slept with is not a "shared option" either. Okay maybe one, but only shared on the situation as perferably "me absent". Yes he was that bad and kept trying to convince me how good he was....while I was on the phone!!! *shaking head* not great "reference material".

In the 10 questions "REDBOOK MAGAZINE" asked and answered, however, to keep things brief, I only posed questions.........one question was asked about "anal sex". Is this not a tabboo of sorts...everyone talks about it but in the end, no pun intended, is an exit only portion of the body and if anyone tries to enter well hello "epiderals aren't without perscription" material!!!! Think about it, women can give birth and feel no pain with epiderals so hey if you want anal sex you better come with *no pun intended* medication in hand, otherwise, never forget exit only baby!!!!

Now back to the article I've linked everyone too, does anyone fantasy about women in their bed???? Okay men whom are single, I know you do, but couples, do you want same sex "shows" for lack of a better word? And why just women on women ~ why is it okay for a man to get his fantasy and a woman if her fantasy is to have two men at the same time ~ mind you them not doing the exit only issue ~ but strickly to satisfy her ~ why do men have such a problem with that? Or is it....in the words of my favorite "boxer man" what's good for the goose isn't good for the gander???????

I personally have no desire for a woman or another man in my bed, I'm a huge flirt, but I'm very satisfied at home. No need to search further, however, I do have an overly active mind and ask more questions than I'm willing to hear the answers too :smile so to speak..............

Am slightly afraid to hear responses on this one, but hey, bring them on, I'm not afraid.....

EVERYTIME I FIND MR. RIGHT ~ MY HUBAND SCARES HIM AWAY

Man they have self help books, classes, internet classes etc on everything these days don't they? I was reading up to find something interesting to post about ~ then as I was searching and reading I had to sit here and laugh at some of the advise being offered out.

A few of the topics I found they give step by step reading material:

First one ~ "Bring Back The Passion! Increase your sex life in 6 weeks"

Come on it takes 6 weeks to bring back passion??? Hell by that time I'd have started my monthly friend and then I'd have to start the class all over again ~ gezzzz..........

Second one ~ this one killed me ~ "20 Ways To Have Better Sex Tonight" ~ other than positions does one actually need 20 directions to get laid??? What happened to showing up at the door in nothing but heels and a smile? Seems to work around here.

Third one ~ "Pain After Anal Sex" ~ :wtf that sounds PAINFUL period!!!!

The fourth one ~ really cracked me up ~ all I could say was there are either some really unsatisfied women out there or else I par take too much in sex.......I opt for the first option!!! :biggrin. Being virgin like and all that I am :smile. This one is 10 questions asked and answered ~ I'll just post the questions:

1. What exactly does an orgasm feel like, and how do I know if I've had one?

2. What am I discharging during sex?

3. Where is my g-spot?

4. Why doesn't my significant other last longer?

5. Can toys desensitze you?

6. Could the pill be ruining my orgasm?

7. Is anal sex dangerous?

8. Do you really blow during a blow job?

9. Is masturbating bad for women?

10. Why do I need to pee when approaching an orgasm?

I found this article in Redbook magazine. I swear I had to laugh and the answers to the questions were even funnier. Luckily for the women who were writing in didn't get my responses...........I swear on number 8 I tell them of course why do you think it is called a blow job..........:lol NOT!!!!

As you can see I've had some intersting reading tonight..........I think I'll go to bed now ~ sorry to have bored you but well this was the best I could find.....:biggrin.

Have a good nite!!!

IF AT FIRST YOU DON'T SUCCEED ~ BLAME YOUR SERVER

I stole this from ~T~'s blog :smile, since I don't have much to post about I figured what the hey I'll post this. Have a great day everyone!!!!

Hematite


What Stone Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Okay I was reading up on my blogs, found out, my mom Buffy requested for one of my men, Madbull to post questions for one to answer....okay yeah I'm a bit out of sorts.....:sad

However, I'll work the questions.....*sniffle*....they are as follow.......

1) What do you like to do when you go out?

Dance Dance Dance ~ first part of the night out

2) What thing about your life do you regret the most?

Complicated question for me!!! I'd like to say my ex-husband, but without him I'd not have Q14 ~ losing his twin would be what I regret most in my life actually.

3) Which decade of your life was the best, and why?

late *emphasising LATE*70's and early *empahsising early* 80's ~ and well none of your business ~ ranks in the TMI catagory!!! :smile

4) If you had it to do all over again, would you still marry the person you are
with?

Yes ~ enough said

5) If you could change one thing (just one, now) about your life, what would it
be?

I'd be kinder to other people

6) If you were able to choose the manner of your death, how would you make your exit?

Old enough to see my children happy and in my sleep........

Well I have linked you up to some great blogs...go check them out....and Dr. D is a boxer, ohhh damn, person to read as well :biggrin.

If ever interested in some great reads, check out my side bar, they never fail to keep you entertained and informed!!!...............

I'm really going to bed now everyone......Ms. Prissy Princess comes home tomorrow, I need to be rested up.....:lol

Nite all

They can never give a bad concert first and foremost I must say this ~ but the Hell Freezes Over Tour ~ much better than this one. Only because I saw that tour also while in North Carolina, I have something to compare this tour to the other tour.

Speedbump told me that drinks were wayyyyy to expensive at the AA Center, where they were performing, and enlightenend me to begin drinking early....yeah like I need encouragment, it is 5 o'clock somewhere right? However, I held off till around 3'ish central time before begining my ":cocktail" hour :biggrin.

Keep in mind we had to leave by 5 our time to move through rush hour traffic to drop off kids, eat, and make it to the concert on time, which we made it there in a nick of time mind you.

We found our seats, the beer guy, (footnote: a true sweetie ~ I got to know him well *wink*) made sure our row was happy alcohol wise!!! I was in my true setting, surrounded by men!!!!! Sitting that close together of course you begin to talk. :biggrin!!!!

Ask ~T~ she got phone calls through the concert, voice mails for songs, so on so forth!!! However, she and I were both PISSED they didn't play "Witchey Woman". I tried my best to talk Speed into, after the concert, to let me go to the stage and climb up and talk someone into letting me back stage.

His only comment was, it doesn't scare me you asked, it scares me you'd actually get your way, and the answer is NO we are going home to celebrate your early birthday together. :lol Go figure what he was thinking and got *wink*!!!!

I tried T ~ I was going to go back there and call you and have them sing "Witchy Woman"!!!!! Blame Speedbump!!!! And people wonder why the top blog says what it does!!! :biggrin

I kept asking Speed are you having a good time, because he didn't seem like he was, his only response, not as good as you....hummmmmmmm :wtf does that mean exactly??????? :lol

Okay, so I'm surrounded by men, who for the record are buying me alcohol, I'm at a concert, the EAGLES I might add, *YEAH BABY*, and it is my birthday celebration ............. still trying to figure out this problem setting is.........:smile.

The concert was set up like this, every song had a digital video back drop that fit the song they were playing. The only big screen they had to show the players was one, divided into 5 sections. Other than that no other screens were visable around the statium. First thing I didn't like, as in their other tour, they had TONS of close up screens of all of the orginial Eagle band singers. As well as they did their own spin offs, Don Henley, in the Hells Freezes Over Tour, did a complete set himself. Made the concert longer to boot. At the price we paid I wanted more than 2 1/2 hours if that much with a 30 minute intermission, trust me!!!!! As well as, Glenn Fry did a set in the Hell Freezes Over Tour, and they played around more together showing they were still friends, not in this tour however, it was strickly singing.....I was a tad disappointed. When they performed in North Carolina, the concert was a full 3 1/2 hour songs, 3 encours, and a 30 minute intermission. Not this one!!! Neither here nor there, if you haven't seen them in concert, they are WORTH EVERY PENNY, if you have, save your money!!!

This tour is a shorter "set time" ~ with encores!!! They had three and we were in and out in less than two hours. That disappointed me ~ thier first tour a few years back was longer than that WITHOUT encores!!! *Footnote: if you go see them, *which I HIGHLY RECOMMEND*, when they sing "Desporato", they are DONE ~ FINISHED ~ Not coming back!!!!*

I'm telling Speed he needs to post HIS own version of the concert and all that went on ~ so keep your eyes open for that ~ and be afraid as he was sober ~ I wasn't :lol. Go Figure!!! :lol

Hope everyone had a GREAT weekend ~ in reference to my last post ~ The Federal District Court refuse to reopen the Roe vs. Wade issue. Anyhoot, enough said on that subject :smile. I had a great time at the concert, if Speed didn't at the concert, he sure as hell did when he got home *wink*........

IF YOU LOOK LIKE YOUR PASSPORT PICTURE ~ YOU PROBABLY NEED THE TRIP

For us women, what is going to be next if they win this one, they decide we don't need to vote anymore? What am I talking about??? Well look what I came across in the breaking news section today. An interesting read to say the least ~ the woman who changed the law to finally legalize abortion has how many years later had a change of heart and now wants to make it ILLEGAL!!! :uhoh3

I do not believe that woman should use abortions as a form of birth control, however, I do believe that there are situations where abortions are necessary and having a safe and clean environment with a REAL doctor present is as important in those situations as having the same thing for cancer patients, heart patients and the like.

What about those women who have illness that it boils down to the baby or the mother if not both ~ are they trying to say that someone who doesn't even know this person other than a visit and information on paper is going to choose who lives or dies? Why is it important to take that right away from the woman once again? Could it be because now Jane Doe doesn't need to obtain an abortion? Or is it that they see the world going to hell in a hand basket and they figure REVERTING back in time would benifit us as women? I think NOT!!!

Are these people to include the famous Jane Doe who changed the law for the better of women ~ as she herself had stated ~ it is a woman's choice!!! So now she thinks that women who have been violently raped ~ violated to the core of their beings ~ should wind up pregnant should carry the child as a constant reminder of the horror they will live with for the rest of their lives without a baby being brought into the world? Where the rapist can continue to torment the mother by exersicing their father parental rights? Rather he is in jail or not has the right *GAWD KNOWS WHY* but hey he does to demand his rights be enforced.

I'm sorry I just find this whole Jane Doe taking such a charge to remove the law that she fought to obtain is a way for her to seek more 15 minutes of fame and history breaking issues again. For what purpose though?

I personally do not know if I could ever go through with an abortion, but at least as it stands right now, if ever in a position where it would be a possiblity I would like to be the one who makes that decision, not people who have NO CLUE about my life, my situation etc. telling me I am a murder and don't value life.

What do you think about this new issue being raised once again but with a whole new ball of wax on the band wagon?

<>GOING TO CHURCH DOES NOT MAKE YOU A CHRISTIAN ANYMORE THAN STANDING IN A GARAGE MAKES YOU A CAR

Can't wait to grow up and get away from them, you finally move, and can't wait to be back near them ~ that is unless they are on the war path with you!!! Today I actually had to sit back and think seriously ~ how I'm living in Texas ~ my mom is in Michigan settling my Grammie's estate ~ my daddy flying into Michigan that "I" get in trouble!!!

Then I sat back and remembered ~ it began about three weeks ago ~ I get a phone call from my mama ~ asking me to find the cheapest flight on a particular date for daddy one way ~ so I began my search.

*footnote ~ I got them a hell of a deal*

So I called them back told them what I found and for what price ~ of course they both questioned me ~ NOT POSSIBLE ~ that is too good to be true ~ *shrugs* I can only go by what my computer screen tells me and what it is telling me is exactly what I told you ~

BUY IT BUY IT they say ~ give me all the information to purchase the ticket for them ~ all is right in the world ~ I am now in the slot for "favorite child" :biggrin.

That is UNTIL TODAY!!! The actual date of the flight!!! 7 a.m. my phone rings!!! Anyone who knows me KNOWS calling before 10 a.m. is a BIG NO NO ~ emeregencies 9 A.M. is pushing it!!! I answer ~ FIRST mistake of my day ~ it is my daddy ~ calling from the airport!!

See he had a lay over ~ the town in Michigan that again "I" thought according to airport code was closer for mama to pick him up turned out to be the same code for the airport in NEW YORK!!! See with connecting flights they don't give you the drop down menu to make sure the airport codes are what you think ~ and yes people airports have duplicated codes throughout the US ~ I found this out TODAY!!!

Anyhoot ~ after the whole guilt trip of me sending him to the airport of Al who ever *I can't spell it* making me feel like shit ~ BEFORE COFFEE I MIGHT ADD much less going first morning potty call ~ I hang up feeling like the worst individual walking the planet called earth...........

So I call mama ~ :brick ~ she answers and the first words out of her mouth after hearing my voice is ~ DO YOU KNOW WHERE YOUR DAD IS GOING TO BE!!! No mama ~ I did all this intentionally because I didn't think you had ENOUGHT TO BITCH AT ME ABOUT!!!! :angry

After I made sure that mama was aware of what time daddy was now due to land at a different airport in Michigan I hang up and TRY to got back to sleep ~ I quickly gave it up after dreaming of all sorts of possible issues that could happen with airplanes and mile high club was not on that list!!!

I pase, I clean, I cook, I clean some more and then finally my phone rings it is mama ~

It is about the time my daddy is suppose to be landed and safely in her arms ~ :uhoh3 ~ words one NEVER let me repeat NEVER says to another individual while waiting for a flight to land is ~ "Jamie, *silence*, there is a problem"!!! I hold my breath and say "WHAT IS DADDY OKAY ~ WHAT"!!!!

Mama giggles and says your dad has a lay over till possibly tomorrow in New York!!! He is LIVID!!! What did I want to do to my mom at that point and time ~ :pummel

So I have to walk through my stupid ~ and trust me I'm being nice when I again emphaise STUPID aunt ~ who talked to daddy try and tell mama what was said ~ somehow between the two of them I found out ~ Daddy was delayed, however he didn't know for how long, the flight was not canceled and it wasn't for an overnight issue :errrr

I tell mama I'll call her back ~ I hang up ~ pull up the flight information for daddy's flight only to find out they are in route already ~ so to confirm my findings I call the airlines themself ask about the flight number ~ they inform me it is already in flight and tell me the reason for delay :thumb

I call mama back ~ she is screaming stop calling I'm waiting to hear from your dad ~ :angry ~ I tell her fine then I won't tell you he is ALREADY IN THE AIR and he'll be landing at THIS TIME ~ I hang up

She immediately calls me back ~ saying "What how do you know" *shaking head* I then began to tell her what altitude he was flying the speed and exactly where his plane was located at that particular time we were talking as the airline he was flying provides flight status online moment by moment :biggrin!!!

So the day ended all right in the world, daddy landing bickering saying Good Lord she can even track me in the air ~ parents are no longer safe in America ! Yes I felt like :pummel him at that particular point in time, but yet, you have to know my daddy ~ he LIVES for this type of turmoil in my life!!! Personally if all said and done ~ HE PLANNED IT!!!!! Yupe I think so!!!! :smile

A conversation in the life between my parents and I ~ aren't you glad I shared :lol For those of you who know my parents and their antics ~ you can stop laughing now as I found NO HUMOR in this issue today!!!

IF IT WEREN'T FOR STRESS I'D HAVE NO ENERGY AT ALL

While talking with T the other night on the phone till all hours of the a.m. :smile. She and I decided to give ~e~ his wish on national TV. She and I are going to apply for the Amazing Race Reality Show.

Yes I know ~ I stated in an earlier post I'd not participate in any of these, however, between T and I it would be up in the air on what dirt the media finds on us first :biggrin. Plus we'd probably not even make the cut ~ at least that is what we are both hoping for :smile.

~e~ of course, thinks she and I should host an online talk show :lol ~ but after discussing all these reality shows, she told me you send in the application and if we are selected I'll participate with you ~ she and I both agreed it would be the most "bleeped" show in the history of man!!! I guess you'd have to hear me and T talk to one another to truely understand the depth of that statement :lol.

Reality shows might become a thing of the past after she and I are on TV ~ and Lord knows my daddy a preacher HA!!!! I can see him sitting in his recliner *because I'd never let them know I did this* ~ flipping through the channels on cable and seeing my face and HEY not a mug shot on CNN for most wanted at the moment :biggrin!!! After watching it however, his might be on CNN for killing me!!!

Knowing my daddy he'd sit and watch ~ and after the second bleep between T and I ~ he'd move on grumbling ~ but if we won ~ which if we participate we'd damn sure better win..........he'd get over it ~ right? :lol. Left to our devises to obtain money for travel.........HEY this is T and myself we are talking about ~ we can become very creative!!! However, I did state, if it boiled down to having to strip it is a coin toss :lol.

She however told me if any bungy jumping and swiming in areas where one can not see the bottom I had to go first because well I'd never do it :lol. For if she went first I'd be standing either on the top or across the water waving at her saying "How was it ~ because I'm NOT doing it!!!"

Here is a visiual for yeah with bungy jumping, T saying, "ahhhh James just try on the equipment and make sure it fits".............once it is on her kicking me off the edge and screaming "SIKEEEEEEEEEEEE"............................*shaking head*........bottom line if I'm going to be swinging upside down from anything it damn well better be sexually orinated!!!! The ONLY way I'd consider bungy jumping is if it gave me a boob lift fore going surgery!!!!

Are you guys afraid if we actually become contenstents??? WE ARE!!!! Talk about blog world taking a new meaning :lol!!! If in doubt of what to post check you local TV GUIDE!!!!! :biggrin!!!

T did however inform me, my flask would not be exceptable nor could I blame it adding flavor to caaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwwfffffffffffffeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!! For some reason Tequila is not considred early a.m. coffee execptable........:wtf? Tequila has always brought smiles and good moods in my experience hense all I will say on that issue.......other than Tequlia you are a friend of mine........I like to drink with a little ~ well you get the picture.......:wink. Do they frisk ya before sending you off to the land of the unknown???

I LOVE COOKING WITH WINE ~ SOMETIMES I EVEN PUT IT IN THE FOOD

Happy Father's Day ~ I realize it is a day early ~ but wanted to share a beautiful story a friend sent me. So many have lost forever the opportunity to forgive, or be forgiven........simply because of pride. What a rotten shame that pride/ego is more important than having peace in one's heart. "I'm so sorry I hurt you. Will you please forgive me?" Two little sentences that can take the weight of the world off our shoulders, and replace the burden we carry with overwhelming peace and contentment. It is such a pity that so many adults simply cannot utter those words, nor be willing to humble themselves. Broken hearts can be mended,and friendships and relationships restored so easily when we are willing to replace pride with true repentance and humility.

Here is the story ~

Room 712

The hospital was unusually quiet that bleak January evening, quiet and
still like the air before a storm. I stood in the nurses' station on the
seventh floor and glanced at the clock.
It was 9 P.M. I threw a stethoscope around my neck and headed for room 712,
last room on the hall. Room 712 had a new patient. Mr. Williams. A man all
alone. A man strangely silent about his family.
As I entered the room, Mr. Williams looked up eagerly, but drooped his eyes
when he saw it was only me, his nurse. I pressed the stethoscope over his
chest and listened. Strong, slow, even beating. Just what I wanted to hear.
There seemed little indication he had suffered a slight heart attack a few
hours earlier.
He looked up from his starched white bed. "Nurse, would you -" He hesitated,
tears filling his eyes. Once before he had started to ask me a question, but
changed his mind. I touched his hand, waiting. He brushed away a tear.
"Would you call my daughter? Tell her I've had a heart attack. A slight one.
You see, I live alone and she is the only family I have."
His respiration suddenly speeded up. I turned his nasal oxygen up to eight
liters a minute. "Of course I'll call her," I said, studying his face. He
gripped the sheets and pulled himself forward, his face tense with urgency.
"Will you call her right away - as soon as you can?"
He was breathing fast - too fast. "I'll call her the very first thing," I
said, patting his shoulder. I flipped off the light. He closed his eyes,
such young blue eyes in his 50 - year - old face.
Room 712 was dark except for a faint night light under the sink. Oxygen
gurgled in the green tubes above his bed. Reluctant to leave, I moved
through the shadowy silence to the window. The panes were cold. Below a
foggy mist curled through the hospital parking lot.
"Nurse," he called, "could you get me a pencil and paper?"
I dug a scrap of yellow paper and a pen from my pocket and set it on the
bedside table.
I walked back to the nurses' station and sat in a squeaky swivel chair by
the phone. Mr. Williams's daughter was listed on his chart as the next of
kin. I got her number from information and dialed.
Her soft voice answered. "Janie, this is Sue Kidd, a registered nurse at the
hospital. I'm calling about your father. He was admitted tonight with a
slight heart attack and "
"No!" she screamed into the phone, startling me. "He's not dying is he ?"
"His condition is stable at the moment," I said, trying hard to sound
convincing. Silence. I bit my lip.
"You must not let him die!" she said. Her voice was so utterly compelling
that my hand trembled on the phone.
"He is getting the very best care."
"But you don't understand," she pleaded. "My daddy and I haven't spoken. On
my 21st birthday, we had a fight over my boyfriend. I ran out of the house.
I haven't been back. All these months I've wanted to go to him for
forgiveness. The last thing I said to him was, 'I hate you."
Her voice cracked and I heard her heave great agonizing sobs. I sat,
listening, tears burning my eyes. A father and a daughter, so lost to each
other. Then I was thinking of my own father, many miles away. It has been so
long since I had said, "I love you."
As Janie struggled to control her tears, I breathed a prayer. "Please God,
let this daughter find forgiveness."
"I'm coming. Now! I'll be there in 30 minutes," she said.
Click. She had hung up. I tried to busy myself with a stack of charts on the
desk. I couldn't concentrate. Room 712; I knew I had to get back to 712.
I hurried down the hall nearly in a run. I opened the door. Mr.Williams lay
unmoving. I reached for his pulse. There was none.
"Code 99, Room 712. Code 99. Stat." The alert was shooting through the
hospital within seconds after I called the switchboard through the intercom
by the bed.
Mr. Williams had a cardiac arrest. With lightning speed I leveled the bed
and bent over his mouth, breathing air into his lungs (twice). I positioned
my hands over his chest and compressed. One, two, three. I tried to count.
At fifteen I moved back to his mouth and breathed as deeply as I could.
Where was help? Again I compressed and breathed, Compressed and . He could
not die!
"O God," I prayed. "His daughter is coming! Don't let it end this way."
The door burst open. Doctors and nurses poured into the room pushing
emergency equipment. A doctor took over the manual compression of the heart.
A tube was inserted through his mouth as an airway. Nurses plunged syringes
of medicine into the intravenous tubing.
I connected the heart monitor. Nothing. Not a beat.
My own heart pounded. "God, don't let it end like this. Not in bitterness
and hatred. His daughter is coming. Let her find peace."
"Stand back," cried a doctor. I handed him the paddles for the electrical
shock to the heart. He placed them on Mr. Williams's chest. Over and over we
tried. But nothing. No response.
Mr. Williams was dead. A nurse unplugged the oxygen. The gurgling stopped.
One by one they left, grim and silent.
How could this happen? How? I stood by his bed, stunned. A cold wind rattled
the window, pelting the panes with snow. Outside -everywhere - seemed a bed
of blackness, cold and dark. How could I face his daughter?
When I left the room, I saw her against a wall by a water fountain. A doctor
who had been inside 712 only moments before stood at her side, talking to
her, gripping her elbow. Then he moved on, leaving her slumped against the
wall. Such pathetic hurt reflected from her face. Such wounded eyes. She
knew.
The doctor had told her that her father was gone. I took her hand and led
her into the nurses' lounge. We sat on little green stools, neither saying a
word. She stared straight ahead at a pharmaceutical calendar, glass-faced,
almost breakable-looking.
"Janie, I'm so, so sorry," I said. It was pitifully inadequate.
"I never hated him, you know. I loved him," she said.
God, please help her, I thought.
Suddenly she whirled toward me. "I want to see him."
My first thought was, Why put yourself through more pain? Seeing him will
only make it worse. But I got up and wrapped my arm around her. We walked
slowly down the corridor to 712. Outside the door I squeezed her hand,
wishing she would change her mind about going inside. She pushed open the
door.
We moved to the bed, huddled together, taking small steps in unison. Janie
leaned over the bed and buried her face in the sheets. I tried not to look
at her at this sad, sad good-bye. I backed against the bedside table. My
hand fell upon a scrap of yellow paper. I picked it up. It read:
"My dearest Janie,
I forgive you. I pray you will also forgive me. I know that you love me. I
love you too, Daddy"
The note was shaking in my hands as I thrust it toward Janie. She read it
once. Then twice. Her tormented face grew radiant. Peace began to glisten in
her eyes. She hugged the scrap of paper to her breast.
"Thank You, God," I whispered, looking up at the window. A few crystal stars
blinked through the blackness. A snowflake hit the window and melted away,
gone forever. Life seemed as fragile as a snowflake on the window.
But thank You, God, that relationships, sometimes fragile as snowflakes, can
be mended together again - but there is not a moment to spare.
I crept from the room and hurried to the phone. I would call my father. I
would say, "I love you."

EXPERIENCE IS A WONDERFUL THING ~ IT ENABLES YOU TO RECOGNIZE A MISTAKE WHEN YOU MAKE IT AGAIN.

Well Wrigley Gum is adding a new stimulation to chewing gum :smile

I wonder what would happen to the poor guy who purchase this item and doesn't need any help in the "stimulation" department :lol

A friend of mine actually tried the pills and he didn't need in help in that department. He said he was never so happy for those things to wear off ~ I never thought I'd hear a man say that :biggrin.

Now I wonder what they'll come out with for women now :wink.

SOME DAYS ARE A TOTAL WASTE OF MAKEUP

Do you not know that during these months in the state of Texas you don't wash your vehicle, much less WAX IT!!!! Gezzzzz, so therefore, I'm blaming all of my past three days on you!!!! :smile.

Sleepless nights because the dogs and Little Ms. Prissy Princess are scared shitless of thunderstorms........then today we had to dig out our canopy swing from the deep end of the pool due to the 70 plus winds that went through here last night........luckily I saved my potted plants prior to the high winds or I'd really be pissed!!!

However, I can still be nice Texas T-Bone ~ I'll not post a photo of me in a bikini ~ I'll scare you in person when we finally can arrange our schedules and have that cook out / pool party!!! How is that :biggrin!!!

Now to my Irresistible Headlines ~ they had two that really made me giggle today ~ a much needed giggle I might add.......

First ~ the lack of donors for the "Smart Sperm Male Bank" :lol ~ *rolling eyes* Come on now ~ these are men we are talking about ~ you know the one's who usually think with the brain below and they wonder why they have a decline in "Smart Sperm"? *laughing as I'm typing this as I know my men are going to come *no pun intended* out of the wood work on this one!!!!*

Second ~ A man who let his "fingers do too much typing" from Fort Brag ~ this is to me wayyy too comical!!!! I mean really ~ engaged by talking on the internet?????????? Yeah right!!!!!!!!! Cybering doesn't count people!!!!!! And isn't cybering out of the "norm" now???????? Okay well ummm *sly smile* maybe not :wink!!!

Technology has picked up a bit since I had my first computer ~ we've now upgraded to the show and tell stage aka web cam ~ yeah baby!!!! :lol

As you can tell my mood is getting better ~ slowly but surely :smile. I'll just end like this ~ if you are going to tell me what you are going to do at least fire up web cam and SHOW ME BABY ~ I'm employed by Buffy's phone sex company and hey my boss wants to see profit profit profit.....who knows maybe tomorrow when I get my stats in I'll see where someone was searching phone sex companies and that will be in there ~ I've already been found from a yahoo search from the key words "enjoys large ~ fill in the blank" :lol.

Hope everyone had a good nite and has a great day!!!!

EVERYONE HAS A PHOTOGRAPHIC MEMORY ~ SOME JUST DON'T HAVE FILM!!!

Isn't T great :smile ~ she and I were talking on the phone the other night and just like I have to change my house around frequently we got tired of looking at Witchy Bitchy :lol. This is what we decided to try ~ I like it a great deal better myself!! Thank you T for all your help/patience/and advise :wink. Keep checking back as we are also doing a photoblog so you can see our ugly mug shots!!!

Now ~ to the post ~ how many people watch these reality shows that keep popping up out the wazzo? I personally can't stand them ~ I have enough trouble keeping up with my own reality so why on earth watch someone else's. Anyhoot, I was reading where in our area they were doing a show calling, I guess that is what it is called, for an upcoming new show called "Second Chance". The plot, if there is one, is like this ~ you are put in an area with 5 people whom you have dated, loved, whatever that you want to see again and see if you can have a "Second Chance" with at least one of them. HA!!!! I think not!!!

One of the main reasons I'd not do something like this would be because well I don't think I've dated, loved, or whatever 5 guys I'd like to hook back up with ~ that being the whole reason behind the show you can't exactly make a list of 5 new guys you'd like to take a chance with :smile. Second most important reason ~ I don't take rejection well at all ~ :lol.

Then I read today where on this new show that I guess is airing now "For Love Or Money". The guy lost his job and the discussion of his "sketchy inappropriate past with sexual misconduct". He is from this area as well as three of the girls on this show. So not only is he now jobless, but he is going to choice one woman who will no doubt dump him immediately as she cashes her million dollar check he has no idea she is getting :biggrin. Now I'd be more tempted to participate in that one except for the whole rejection issue and the media would look for anything to write about apparently and Lord knows they'd have a field day with me :smile!!

What would you do or if you would participate in one of these reality type shows?

MY REALITY CHECK BOUNCED!!!

At least sometimes :biggrin ~ yes everyone my Speedbump has posted once again ~ contemplated posting twice in one evening, however, well ummm, never mind :wink.

Go check him out ~

MEN HAVE TWO EMOTIONS ~ HUNGRY AND HORNEY ~ IF YOU SEE HIM WITHOUT A BONER ~ MAKE HIM A SANDWICH!!!!

Good Morning everyone :gmorning!!! As you can see I'm off to an early start, well, I've actually been up since 5:30 a.m. I was rudely awaken by almost obtaining a concusion as my black labs head collided with mine. Once I became cohearent, I realized my baby was having another seziure :sad.

I have some mama bragging rights about last night. As you all are aware I'm living baseball summer hell ~ living in the heat of Texas isn't punishment enough my son and hubby think I have to endure a sport I HATE!!! Not with just one team but TWO now :errrr ~ anyways ~ last night ~

Our team is losing, but Q14 was pitching really well ~ they were only losing by one ~ bottom of the 6th inning ~ our team up to bat ~ we get two players on base ~ Q14 gets up to bat.

Piece of valuable information here ~ batting is not Q14's strong suit ~ he can play any position on the field and considered a valuable player, can run like the wind, but batting he hasn't conqured that well yet like he'd like.

First pitch ~ good eye ~ it is a ball ~ second pitch ~ you can tell by his body language he is about to swing ~ he swings and slaps the crap out of the ball ~ as we are cheering him on ~ watching the ball ITS OUTTA THERE!!!!!! :mouse He hit a home run. Q14 realized it before any of us and just stood there in shock :lol

Of course we are yelling run run ~ he just turns around looks at us glowing!!! Got the three runs and won the game!!! Now if they'd do a lot more of that I could find myself enjoying the game a bit more :smile. However, everynite of the week and weekend is growing OLD fast!!

He gave me his homerun ball to add to my now overflowing collection of items I've saved from his life thus far ~

It seems that insomnia is running in the family ~ Little Ms. Prissy went to bed fairly easy last night ~ but by 2 a.m. she was wide awake and wandering around the house playing tag with mama and daddy on whom had to get up and stay up ~ on a night that I can finally sleep she decides she can't GAWD help me!!

Well I had mentioned in an earlier post to add a photo of my Q14 so as promised ~ here he is :smile. Just click on the link below ~

View image

Hope everyone has a good day ~ :groupwave

I'D LIVE IN THE FAST LANE, BUT I'M MARRIED TO A SPEEDBUMP

Have a great day!!!

Welcome to my little piece of heaven. Beautiful isn’t it? Makes you just want to sit down on the nearest cove and bury your feet in the sand to feel the breeze on your face, the smell of the salt air filling up your senses and making all the wrong’s in one’s world completely right once again.

Watching few people walking the beach for exercise or romance yet sitting on the side lines and smiling ~ for once allowing your mind to wander and remember ~ the pleasures and antics of one’s youth, how can one not smile over such issues? How time flies by isn’t it ~ one’s youth seems so long ago and more than a distant memory, yet while sitting on a beach hearing nothing but the crashing of the waves as the tide comes in ~ your mind working in many different directions of one’s life. Youth doesn’t seem that far out of reach!

The beach has always been my solitude, peace of mind, can right any wrong and make life enjoyable once again. Rather it is lying on the beach baking myself or sitting on a hill just watching people walk by and the sunset allowing your mind to wander where you don’t allow it to follow during your day-to-day activities. The ocean seems out of reach, solitude is only a dream, yet somehow, once again, you find that much needed solitude and calgon didn’t have anything to do with it :smile.

All it took was the washing of the waves, the seagulls flying above you, the sun setting just like the most enjoyable things in life, out of reach and within a few hours out of sight and mind until the sunset takes the same position many years down the road!

Hope you enjoyed my little piece of heaven!!!! Have a great nite!!!

Well since I bored you all with my insomnia ramblings :smile I figured since my mind is so tired from lack of sleep I'd share some humor my mother n law sent me today ~ see it is safe to read now :biggrin.

Don't be offended guys, just enjoy good humor. And ladies, you can enjoy
it too.

A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I am going to make you the
happiest woman in the world."

The woman says, "I'll miss you."

_______________________

"It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he stepped out
of the shower, "honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I
mowed the lawn like this?"

"Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.

_______________________

He said - Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love to
you really badly.

She said - Well, you succeeded.

______________________

He said - Shall we try swapping positions tonight?

She said - That's a good idea...you stand by the ironing board while I
sit on the sofa and fart.

_____________________

He said - What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?

She said - Turn sideways and look in the mirror

______________________

Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?

A: A rumor

Well it is 4:30 a.m. and I'd like to chalk up while I'm still awake due to filling in some of the "incomplete" sentences I've posted earlier or at least just getting home from a night of dancing, but well sad as it is, I just can't sleep.

I've been told by ~T~ she knows why I can't sleep and my mood, however, I wish it was that simple, been going on too long before that particular issue maybe that was just the topping on the cake so to speak.......

Are you lost yet????????? :smile Well then good I'm keeping my warped mind a mystery :lol

Tonight should have been, in a perfect world, a night of *sly smile*!!!! Little Ms. Prissy Princess is out of the house until tomorrow nite WOOOHOOOO, however, "BASEBALL", :angry takes over our lives this summer. Q14 on two select teams, one already having a shoe in to the Mi. world series and this weekend if their team wins a shoe in to the St. Louis world series. Now can someone explain this to me???? Isn't there only ONE world series for ANY league in baseball??? I'm into the more contact sport, FOOTBALL, put some firm asses into a tight uniform and have them bend over and well hello "Heaven, I'm in Heaven". Chasing a ball in the air is way too much for my liking of "golf", now there is a sport we could discuss ~ that in my humble opinion, is nothing short of a man wanting to get the ball in the hole and a woman wishing they could obtain their goal :biggrin.

While I was talking to Amies, a dear friend of mine and also ~T~, I was sitting outside so hubby could get some much needed sleep for his big coaching day tomorrow starting at 7:30 am *not enough coffee in the world to rise me at that hour* on the field and ready to warm up. :wtf is up with that? Guess who won't make the "first" game tomorrow :smile. Because I was looking at the Texas sky and saw the stars shining.............

It reminds me of when my Grandpa was alive and we were out feeding the horses in Wyoming. I was complaining I needed a tan and my Grandpa just laughed saying well if you want to know if the sun is going to shine the next day ~ the stars tells it all ~ that is when I learned you know when the clouds are moving out from an overcast or rainy day by watching how many stars appear while you just look up. *of course he put a whole deep thought process along with it ~ but that is between me and Grandpa :smile*

Have you noticed I may need a STRONG :cocktail ~ scarest thing is I'm dead sober!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *huge pout* Insomina makes you think of the wackest things I'm finding out :smile. Yet, on the flip side of that coin, the most comforting things from people who have past!!!

Grandpa always knew what a bitch I was, am, and HA, probably always will be, hense why he nicked named me at the age 3 "QueenBee" of the family. Somehow that has always stuck ~ even with people who didn't know my Grandpa ~

I don' t know maybe tooo many things are coming "full circle" for me too soon and too close together ~ I'm losing too many people whom are my rocks too fast and not ready to let them go ~ maybe I'm just not ready to grow up and let go of the past ~ who the f*** knows.............other than bottom line I HATE INSOMNIA!!!!! But tomorrow according to the sky will be sunny and have no fear, rather I'm sleeping, awake or barely living, my large body will be plopped outside on a lounge chair catching some rays from the sky my Grandpa made sure I was concious of on a night of insomnia :smile. Then I'll be at the baseball field watching Q14 doing his best on the field. Mama has to at least get one game in from the long weekend filled of baseball till late Monday nite. :smile.

Wish him luck :smile ~ I'll try and get a photo to post on the field tomorrow if not I have current photo's to post at a later date...........sorry to bore everyone!!!!

Have a GREAT DAY ~ I'm use to this so as they say

I'm the mama

A friend of mine just lost one of his friends to cancer in the last few weeks and has done a memorial page for her. He did a wonderful job and thought I'd share the link with everyone and anyone who was interested in taking a look and see

The addy is www.wolvesdare.com/bobbie

He did a wonderful job I think ~

Have a great nite everyone

Jamie

That my mood is still bad and getting worse by the day :angry!!! I'm done bitching so be happy :smile ~ see I can be nice :lol NOT!!!

Anyhoot, I needed a pick me upp'er considering my mood as of the last two weeks or so and what better thing than reading up on sex articles? :biggrin

Hey Buffy darlin', I found you rules and reg's for your phone sex job :biggrin, contact me privately. This article I was reading where I found MORE nouns, verbings, and adjectives with incomplete sentences :wink they were also discussing the whole phone sex issue........I would add it, however, well sometimes it read like someone tapped in on my phone line :biggrin. HA!!! Yeah I wish!!!

Okay enough of all of that ~ now to what I found and willing to post :biggrin ~

You make me so (adj)
I want you to (verb) my (noun)
You make my (noun) (adj)
Your (noun) makes me so (adj)
I want to (verb) your (noun)
I want to (verb) your (adj) (noun)
I love it when you (verb) my (noun)
I want to make your (noun) (adj)
I love to look at your (adj) (noun)
Thinking about you makes my (noun) (adj)

Okay re-reading these I'm fearful of what hubby is going to post on his blog as he has already threatened to post photo's of kiwi and answer these :blush.

Personally, I don't see how kiwi fits into this, but hey, "kiwi" doesn't do it for me either so what do I know :smile. I'll be interested to hear some feed back thou or at least better stated fearful ~ whatever the case ~ give me a much needed laugh these days okay :biggrin!!!!

MY INNER CHILD IS A LITTLE SASSY BITCH ALSO

I've been spending much time reading up on my blog reading which is long over due, however, even though I didn't comment, it got my twisted mind a working. For those that don't know me, be afraid, for those that know me, are moaning saying ohhhhhhhhhhh where is this going :smile.

I was reading up on T-Bone's blog where he posted his five most memorable kisses. A comical read to say the least one must read him to truely appreciate him!!! Then I was reading on Dr. D's blog on his writings about Blanche. Let me just say 'yummy" and he thinks he can't write HA!!!! You do great Dr. D!!!!

Anyways, reading all of this got my warped mind thinking :biggrin ~

Are you afraid yet?? You should be ~ I won't bore you with my inability of writing or giving you a run down of my first 5 kisses ~ hell I can't even remember those :smile.

However, I do remember my FIRST MEMORABLE kiss ~ I'll share some of that with you ~ as well as my SECOND Meomorable kiss ~

It was way back when in one's memory that they only wish they could forget but yet no matter how old you get, it always creeps back into your mind. Your eyes meet in a teasing manner to begin with and then a proposition that is borderline dare. Yet neither of you can stop smiling at the other ~ yet in both your minds you wonder who will back down first? Well being one never to back down ~ I didn't take my chances ~ I took the first leap..........

The sun was setting when I first wandered up on him ~ he was sitting in a lounge chair drinking a beer talking amoung friends when I wandered up and said "hello'........I truely believe I shocked the man in question as he about choked on his swallow of beer when he looked up and saw me smiling at him. All he could do was smile in his ever so devilish way. His friends pulled me up a chair and offered me a beer which I gladly took because well I was scared shitless, yet as always determined :smile.

We all drank, talked, listened to music until everyone left but me and the person in question..........all of the sudden the only thing between us was the beers we were both nursing, sly smiles, and music as after everyone left neither of us seemed to know how to talk. After all it was a dare, probably one he gave to every woman he saw, I just took him up on it that particular nite :smile.

The sun was almost set completely, the breeze from the ocean was blowing, salt air twisting and turning between us and then I stood and said well I guess I should go. He being the gentlemen he always has been stood with me and then it happened.

I don't even know how exactly as we were saying our goodbyes, I felt his arm wrap around me and our lips met each others.............shyly in the begining then all armours down, as I wrapped my arms around his neck and he pulled me closer.......shyness became an after thought...........and that is when people say "the rest is history" :biggrin

The second most memorable kiss maybe not as 'romantic a setting' but well ~ I'll let you be the judge..............

A man walks off an aircraft carrier for no other reason than to met me........of course me being the type person I've become, I'm hiding!!! I watch his facial expressions of many different emotions.......first the look of excitment searching the large crowd before him, second doubt, third, OMG I'm going to be in this town for 3 days alone I've been stood up. The fourth look is one I'll never forget.........I stood up and smiled ~ his eyes met mine across the turmional and I saw something I've never seen before with any man, he caught his breath. Maybe it was because I was so misheaved but since he married me maybe not :biggrin.............

There was no running or jumping into one another's arms, it was just walking up to one another saying simply "hello there". He just looked at me and actually asked, can I kiss you now? I just smiled and wrapped my arms around his neck and slightly kissed him and said does that answer your question..........that is when the kiss of all kisses happened right there in front of God and everyone.............toe curling, looking for a quick place to hide and well ummmm like they say "the rest is history"............

In my life time I have been kissed manyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy times ~ but these two kisses in my life time are the most memorable they were kisses of possiblities are endless..........those are the best kisses don't you think?

EVERY TIME I FIND MR. RIGHT ~ MY HUSBAND SCARES HIM AWAY

I'm in a mood, hense why I haven't posted, however, a long time friend of mine trying to cheer me up sent me something from way back when, that I still can find humor in even when in a mood :smile.

So since I don't care to discuss my mood I'll share what she sent :biggrin

The Ballad Of The Bobbit Hillbillies
(sing to the tune of the "The Beverly Hillbillies")

Come and listen to my story of a man named John.
A poor ex-marine with a little fraction gone.
It seems one night after gettin' with the wife,
She lopped off his schlong with the swipe of a knife.

(Penis, that is)
(Clean cut, missed his nuts)

Well, the next thing you know there's a ginsu by his side,
And Lorena's in the car takin' willie for a ride.
She soon got tired of her purple-headed friend,
And tossed him out the window as she rounded a bend.

(Curve, that is)
(Pricker shrubs, wheel hubs)

She went to the cops and confessed to the attack,
And they called out the hounds just to get his weenie back.
They sniffed and they barked and they pointed 'over there',
To John Wayne's Henry that was waving in the air.

(Found, that is)
(By a fence, evidence)

Now Peter and John couldn't stay apart too long,
So a dick doc said, 'Hey, I can fix you dong!'
"A needle and a thread is all you're gonna need,"
And the whole world waited 'till they heard that Johnny peed.

(Whizzed, that is)
(Even seam, straight stream)

Well, he healed and he hardened and he took his case to court.
With a cockeyed lawyer since his assets came up short.
They cleared her of assult and acquited him of rape.
And his pecker was the only one they didn't show on tape.

(Video, that is)
(Unexposed, case closed)

At least I found a chuckle in the bad mood I'm in these days :smile ~ however she did offer to write something along these lines about a kiwi so you men who are holding themselves going "ouch" :biggrin ~ okay I"ll refrain my comment :smile.

Nite all ~

Tan lines, that is the ultimate question :smile. So come on guys, do you perfer to see the lines of a bathing suit when looking at the "birthday suit" or not??? Women do you perfer to have lines of the suit or not???

Personally, I do not, I perfer NO LINES on my body rather it be from age or bathing suit. So I invested in buying an "itsey bitsey pok a doitte" :lol NO not really, but an itsey bitsy bikini to have as few lines as possible..........what did I find out?

Well yesterday and today were my first in wear this little *let me emphasis LITTLE* outfit ~ what I have found out ~

Yesterday, I feel asleep ~ Speedbump woke me up and told me I needed to sleep inside otherwise major parts of my body would be fried and untouchable.........please note his desire to obtain the forbidden fruit :biggrin.

However, still got a great tan going on here...............so today...........was cloudy, but mostly sunny, wind blowing, hot, but with the wind you really couldn't feel the heat........so I decided what the hey...........I "suit" up so to speak :smile go and relax in the lounge chair reading while Little Ms. Prissy is swimming..........it got to hot for me just to lay there and bake so I got into the pool with Little Ms. Prissy played for a bit ~ her favorite game is shark *rolling eyes* ~ gets old fast ~ so I climb up on my float and let her wear herself out while I just rest :smile.

In summary, the kiwi got too toasted and the buns got burnt ~ the top half no longer has lines.............and any ideas of laying out tomorrow are well out of the question...........:smile

Everyone have a great nite :smile

MY INNER CHILD IS A SASSY LITTLE BITCH TOO

Well, we survived the sleep over from ages 14 to 4. However, I swear NEVER AGAIN!!!! The boys had the phone permentally attached to their ear, talking to this girl and that girl ~ :errrr. The 4 year olds we decided to wear them out and keep them in the pool until they couldn't swim anymore :smile. Feed them and put them to bed.

Speedbump was proud of that accomplishment that was short lived. He walked into our room and said they are down for the count and before he could turn around to walk out the girls were standing behind him wanting this and wanting that ~ this lasted until almost 2 am :angry.

Finally sleep ~ I'm in sweet slumber snuggling with one of my dogs when I get tapped on my head. I just figured Bruno was stretching and I ignored it and hunkered down further in my bed when I get a harder tap on my head and hear this voice ~ MAMA WAKE UP!!! UUUUGGGGHHHHHHHH I crack an eye and look at both girls standing there smiling and then try and focus on my alarm clock only to see it reads 5 AM ~ :wtf???????????????

So I kick Speedbump tell him his daughter wants him :smile. He snores ~ snorts ~ begins talking about "no that isn't the correct number for that phone here let me check" ~ I know I'm in trouble then but figured at least he isn't talking to some woman about ohhh man that's my wife :lol. But at 5 AM I still found no humor he wouldn't wake up!!!

So I get Little Ms Prissy and her friend to walk back to her room put them back in bed and tell them it is way too early go back to sleep ~ somehow find my way back to my bed, crawl in and doze off.

Thirty minutes later ~ the tapping on my head begins followed with MAMA WAKE UP the :sun_smiley is up. I just mumble yeah and I'm happy for it but MAMA ISN'T!!! :errrr

Well they won needless to say ~ I got up fixed breakfast slaming pots and pans as loudly as I could and still no stiring from the bedroom to rise Speedbump only noise coming out of that room was snoring :angry.

I got the girls settled, feed and watching TV so I curl up with a book and begin reading as I have no energy to take on the task of cleaning the destroyed house from so many kids.

It gets later in the morning ~ I walk in the bedroom with a nice glass of ice water ~ nudge Speedbump and give him an option of which way he'd like to wake up :smile this nice way or a nice cold shower in bed :biggrin. He opted for the first ~ got up and told the girls ~ lets go swimming!!!! So we spent the rest of the day ~ them in the pool and me barely awake laying beside it.

After we were left with only our children for the night ~ me snuggled up in bed reading ~ Speed decided to dink around on the computers :angry ~ another story for another day ~ he managed after several hours to get them back up and running but not without me bitching and moaning the whole time telling him WHY CAN'T YOU JUST LEAVE THEM ALONE!!!!!!! :angry. Anyhoot!!!!

I'm off to my domestic goddess duties :smile.

I'M A LUXURY FEW CAN AFFORD